If you only read one page on this site, this is the one. Your mood when meditating, in every Stage, is critical. The best mood to be in is relaxed, happy, uncritical, accepting everything and expecting nothing. Imagine the best vacation day you’ve ever had. Sink into that feeling before meditating.

I’m not joking about this. If you are frustrated, anxious, angry, resentful, or forcing yourself to meditate – not only will TMI not work, you’ll actually end up unhappier. If you become unhappy during a meditation, stop! Exit the meditation, reset your mood and try again. If you can’t undo a bad mood, stop for the day and try again tomorrow.

If you can’t manage to get yourself in a happy state, a neutral state also works, although your progress will be slower.

There is a good neurological reason for this. All of your conditioning – the neurological patterns that trigger you, make you anxious about the past or future, are stored in a brain region called the amygdala. The only way to “decondition” the amydala is to have sense of safety or “okayness”, (generated by your prefrontal cortex), present when the trigger occurs. Getting the prefrontal cortex to generate that sense of okayness is what setting your mood is all about.

A corollary to this is that you must never force a mental state. If you find yourself pushing towards something (progress of some sort, an exit condition for a Stage, an Awakening, etc), just stop. The correct answer to nearly every meditation problem is to relax and let whatever is going to happen, happen, without judgement or fear or longing. If you haven’t guessed by now, when you are pushing or seeking or avoiding something, your brain is not generating the “okay” signal, and your efforts won’t work and are probably counterproductive.

Much of the rest of the advice on this website is applying these principles to different situations.